Youcat commented through CCC – Question n. 264.

YOUCAT Question n. 264 - What threatens marriages?

(Youcat answer) What really threatens marriages is sin; what renews them is forgiveness; what makes them strong is prayer and trust in God’s presence.

A deepening through CCC

(CCC 1606) Every man experiences evil around him and within himself. This experience makes itself felt in the relationships between man and woman. Their union has always been threatened by discord, a spirit of domination, infidelity, jealousy, and conflicts that can escalate into hatred and separation. This disorder can manifest itself more or less acutely, and can be more or less overcome according to the circumstances of cultures, eras, and individuals, but it does seem to have a universal character. (CCC 1607) According to faith the disorder we notice so painfully does not stem from the nature of man and woman, nor from the nature of their relations, but from sin. As a break with God, the first sin had for its first consequence the rupture of the original communion between man and woman. Their relations were distorted by mutual recriminations (Cf. Gen 3:12); their mutual attraction, the Creator's own gift, changed into a relationship of domination and lust (Cf. Gen 2:22; 3:16b); and the beautiful vocation of man and woman to be fruitful, multiply, and subdue the earth was burdened by the pain of childbirth and the toil of work (Cf. Gen 1:28; 3:16-19).

Reflecting and meditating 

(Youcat comment) Conflict between men and women, which sometimes reaches the point of mutual hatred in marriages, of all places, is not a sign that the sexes are incompatible; nor is there such a thing as a genetic disposition to infidelity or some special psychological disability for lifelong commitments. Many marriages, however, are endangered by a lack of communication and consideration. Then there are economic and societal problems. The decisive role is played by the reality of sin: envy, love of power, a tendency to quarrel, lust, infidelity, and other destructive forces. That is why forgiveness and reconciliation, in confession as well, is an essential part of every marriage.

(CCC Comment)

(CCC 1608) Nevertheless, the order of creation persists, though seriously disturbed. To heal the wounds of sin, man and woman need the help of the grace that God in his infinite mercy never refuses them (Cf. Gen 3:21). Without his help man and woman cannot achieve the union of their lives for which God created them "in the beginning."     

(The next question is:  Are all people called to marriage?)